(2024/11/23 板橋和平堂分享)
「我們曉得萬事都互相效力，叫愛神的人得益處，就是按祂旨意被召的人。」(羅馬書 8:28)
小時候的我，是個驕傲又自負的小孩，總以成績為榮，藐視他人，常用尖銳語言傷人，甚至與同學發生肢體衝突。儘管從小在教會長大，父母也不斷提醒我品格的重要，我卻依舊我行我素，努力在每個可量化的項目中爭取第一，甚至為了成績作弊。
國小畢業後，我進入離家較遠的雙語國中班。面對全英文課程，我從天之驕子淪為勉強及格的學生，內心卻依然驕傲。很快，我遭到同學排擠與霸凌：作業撕毀、櫃子被破壞、甚至有人往我的長笛袋子裡尿尿。那天回家，母親一聞便知道真相，我卻只感到深深的羞辱與絕望。甚至連我唯一的朋友，在一次衝突中也選擇無視我。那段時間，我經常在被窩裡哭泣，向上帝埋怨，甚至威脅祂如果不改變我的處境，我就要改信佛教。
就在谷底時，我參加了校園團契舉辦的營會。那次我第一次聽懂完整的福音，決志信主。回家後，我開始主動翻讀聖經，在神的話語中認識自己的驕傲與罪，也感受到神對我的接納與呼召。我開始改變自己，主動關心曾經欺負我的同學，即使被拒絕，也不再退縮。令人驚訝的是，當我得知誰曾對我做出那些惡意行為時，我竟毫無怨恨，反而真心將他們視為朋友。
一次教會特會中，主持人邀請有感動全職服事的人站出來。我聽見心中的聲音，便走上前。那一刻的感動我一直記得，也成為我後來選擇醫學作為工具、盼望未來能全職傳道的重要起點。
從驕傲到謙卑，從破碎到更新，這一路，是神一步步引領我走出自我中心，走向祂的光。
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)
When I was a child, I was filled with pride. I thought I was better than others because of my good grades. I often looked down on classmates who didn’t do well in school, used hurtful words, and even got into fights. Even though I grew up in church and my parents always reminded me that character is more important than grades, I only cared about being the best. I even cheated once just to have better grades.
After elementary school, I entered a bilingual junior high school far from home. The all-English lessons were very hard for me, and I could barely pass my classes. But deep down, I was still proud. Because of my attitude, I was soon bullied by my classmates. They tore up my homework, broke my locker, and even peed into my flute bag. When I got home that day, my mom could tell what it was by the smell. I felt deeply ashamed and hopeless. Even the only friend I thought I had ignored me during a fight. I cried under my blanket and complained to God. I even told Him that if He didn’t help me, I would stop believing in Him and follow another religion.
At my lowest point, I went to a Christian youth camp. There, I heard the full message of the gospel for the first time. I learned that because of sin, people are far from God and need Jesus to make things right again. I decided to believe in Jesus. After coming home, I started reading the Bible out of curiosity. The more I read, the more interested I became. I saw how proud and sinful I had been, and I began to understand God’s love and his calling for me. Slowly, I started changing. I reached out to classmates who had hurt me, even if they didn’t respond kindly. Amazingly, when I later found out who had done those mean things to me, I felt no hate—only peace, and I even saw them as friends.
One day at a church event, the speaker asked if anyone felt called to serve God full-time. I heard a quiet voice inside me and stood up. That moment stayed with me. Later, I told my parents I wanted to be a pastor. After talking it through, I decided to study medicine first, hoping to use it as a tool to serve God and share the gospel for the rest of my life.
From pride to humility, from brokenness to healing, it was God who gently led me out of myself and into His light.
David Chen 2025/05/26, assisted by ChatGPT
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